


The Words We Read

by mortenavida



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Everyone Is Poly Because Avengers, Multi, Not Beta Read, Polyamory, Pre-Poly, Rejection, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates, brief suicide thought
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-24
Updated: 2020-05-24
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:48:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,105
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24359089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mortenavida/pseuds/mortenavida
Summary: Your soul words appear when you’re eighteen -- if you’re lucky enough to have them. Only half of the bonded are blessed (or cursed) to see the first words their soulmate will ever say to them. For Tony, he would have rather been the other half of his match.Matches.He’s just glad his father wasn’t alive to see the rejection painted across his skin.
Relationships: Bruce Banner/Clint Barton/Steve Rogers/Natasha Romanov/Tony Stark/Thor
Comments: 8
Kudos: 238





	The Words We Read

**Author's Note:**

> Had an idea and I know I wanted it to be longer, but I just don't have time. :( Sorry, so I figure I'd get it down either way. I like me some angsty "my soulmates don't want me" Tony.

The first one showed up at the exact moment Tony Stark was born on his eighteenth birthday.

Sitting on his bed, arms wrapped around his knees, Tony stared at the clock across from him and waited for the numbers to tick over. Born a little after one in the morning, a fact that his mother used to tease him about, Tony waited. Because if the stories were true, and if the gentle buzz that had grown in him all day was any indication, he would be one of the lucky ones to have his soulmate’s words printed on his skin.

As the clock finally clicked over to one am, he wondered what his parents would think of his words. Would they be happy? Would they be proud? Neither of them had anything on them -- their own soulmates never bothered to admit to them the truth or they never happen across them. It happened, sometimes. People were sure that you weren’t rejected because your skin stayed blank. It just meant that you wouldn’t see your soulmate in this life

Something in Tony knew that he would find his soulmate and he would be _happy_. Like Jarvis and Anna were. Anna had the words circled around her wrist like a bracelet. _Forgive me, but you are the most beautiful woman I’ve had the pleasure of meeting_. As soon as Anna had shown him the words, they went straight to the courthouse and got married. Jarvis always told him the story with a wistful smile and Tony _wanted_ that.

He needed that.

It took almost fifteen minutes before Tony felt a tingling on his ankle. He shouted for Rhodey -- waking his roommate from his half-slumber -- and shifted so he could try to read the words appearing there. Together, they watched as each, carefully cursive letter spelled out a message that Tony wished he never saw. A message Tony would spend years trying to forget.

Rhodey said nothing and pulled a quiet Tony against his chest. What was there to say to something as obvious as that?

_I’m not here for you, Stark._

Later, Rhodey would try to offer explanations. Maybe whoever they were happened to be in a rush? Maybe they were part of a kidnapping plot for someone next to him? Maybe, maybe maybe...

Tony hadn’t bothered to show him the other words that showed up. Because when had he ever been normal? To have _four_ instead of one?

 _Sorry, but I have to refuse._ Across his heart.

 _Thanks, I guess?_ Banded around his right arm.

 _Oh, fuck no._ Down his hip.

Tony hid them all. Not even Pepper knew when she came along. Nobody knew.

Not even his soulmates.

\-----

Natasha’s words showed up first, and it made sense that he met her first. Tony wasn’t too worried about dying -- he hadn’t heard any of his words yet, which meant _something_ had to happen to keep him alive. Still, he didn’t want to put his faith in tattoos across his skin, so Pepper got the company. Natasha (Natalie Rushman) came into his private gym with paperwork and, well, Tony was a man with two perfectly good eyes. He didn’t remember what he had told her, but her response burned in his mind.

“I’m not here for you, Stark,” she said with a slight glare, holding out the folder to Pepper.

Tony froze at the phrase, not sure how to respond. Rhodey had partially been right in his assumption that he over-thought the words, but the look in her eyes. She _hated_ him. He took a drink from his water bottle and let Happy pull him back into the mock boxing match, feeling smaller than he had been in years.

Finding out she worked for SHIELD and came to his company to spy on his health didn’t make him feel better. She didn’t seem to like him any better, either, so Tony kept his eyes averted and his mouth shut.

Life continued.

\-----

Out of everyone in the entire world, Steve Rogers was the last person tony expected to have connected to him. At least, in ways other than Howard-fucking-Stark. Sure, he never stopped looking for the lost super-soldier. A failed project from the beginning, he had little hope of one of the expeditions to come back with anything but random scientific data they were also in the arctic looking for. Still, a phone call came and Tony knew he couldn’t stand by and let a national icon rot away with SHIELD.

He had flown out the next morning to New York to overlook the Captain’s defrosting. And then he had personally seen that the man’s intelligence not be shat on by posing a false room for him. Fury argued, Tony threw money at him, and Steve finally woke up in a normal hospital bed with Tony Stark’s face being the first thing he saw.

It would have been romantic had Tony actually let the nurses do their thing before he opened his mouth and ruined it all. But he wouldn’t be Tony Stark if he didn’t ruin every relationship he attempted to have.

“Welcome to the year 2012,” he said with a wide smile. “Not Howard, but I’m his son Tony. You probably have a lot of questions.” When Steve didn’t say anything, Tony shrugged and pushed the button for the nurse to come in. “I’ll be back in a bit after they’ve checked you out. I’m sure we have a lot to talk about.”

Tony left the room as promised, letting the nurses check over vitals and whatever else they had to do to make sure Steve was okay. In the meantime, Jarvis hacked his way through the servers to see what they had planned for the Captain’s quarters. They were... less than ideal. A small room with the rest of the on-site staff, meals in the cafeteria, and constant surveillance. None of that seemed right.

Tony pushed his way back into the room as the last of the nurses left and he smiled at the man sitting up on the bed. Steve looked more aware of his surroundings and his hands gripped the bedsheets as Tony settled in a chair next to the bed. Not wanting to waste more time in the facility, Tony laid out their plans for the Captain and then offered his own alternative one: stay with Tony. They had just finished the penthouse in a brand-new tower in New York, so there shouldn’t be any issue of room. Pepper’s first night there had been last week, and Tony had joined her as soon as they found Steve in the ice. 

The plan was perfect. Steve would get to ease into the new world without SHIELD breathing down his back. Fury wouldn’t get to make decisions Steve didn’t want to go along with (but did out of some weird sense of duty). Tony would finally get to know the man his dad wouldn’t shut up about.

When Tony finished his speech, Steve let out a breath and tore another hole through Tony’s damaged heart. This one, Tony didn’t think he could have misread. This one Tony _knew_ was about him, though he wasn’t sure how just yet. His attitude? Did he come on too strong? Or did the nurses explain all about Tony and Steve made his decision before Tony came into the room?

“Sorry, but I have to refuse.”

Tony was sure he would never know. He left the room without another word, wrapping his hurt tight to his chest to Steve couldn’t see it. So Steve _wouldn’t_ see it.

That was two in a matter of a year.

But life wasn’t done fucking him over, yet.

\-----

Meeting another intellectual individual that could actually keep up with your science dump talk had been Tony’s dream for a long time. Arriving at SHIELD’s hellicarrier, _knowing_ that Dr. Bruce Banner was on board, made him feel like a child again. He made sure to store the amour quickly so he could go greet the man. 

Coulson met him halfway and after Tony promised to send him out to meet his cellist crush, the fun began. Not wanting to give away his excitement, Tony directed his techno-babble to the room in general, teasing the others who gave him blank looks. Finally, _finally,_ he looked toward Bruce and gave the man a wide smile.

“Finally, someone who speaks English.”

A frown crossed the doctor’s face as Steve muttered something under his breath. He opened his mouth, closed it, and then shook his head. And Tony’s heart broke all over at the next comment because the confused and disappointed look that stayed on Bruce’s face told him everything he needed to know. He was right about this one, too.

“Thanks, I guess?”

Bruce then turned his attention back toward the table and started speaking in a way even Steve with his lack of future knowledge could follow. Tony got the message and toned down his own vocabulary, adding what he could to the almost-finished discussion. It wasn’t long before the two scientists started for the onboard lab to track down the cube.

As Tony walked beside his third soulmate, rejection stirring in his heart, he had to wonder why fate was doing this to him _now_. Natasha less than a year ago, Steve not even a week ago, and now Bruce.

One more to go, and he was already dreading who it would be.

\-----

The last thing on Tony’s mind as the horde of aliens screamed at them was his soulmate issues. He landed with the team and looked around at the angry beings, trying to calculate if he had enough firepower to even finish this battle. Sure, the other suits were in the tower, but they weren’t as protective. Weren’t as powerful. He would need to be smart about this. He needed... he needed Steve. The Captain was a great strategist and Tony knew when to back up and let someone better take over (despite Pepper thinking otherwise).

So he told Steve to call the shots, and the man took to it easily. When he heard his own orders, bring the archer to a high spot so he could be their eyes, he nodded and walked toward the recently un-brainwashed man.

“Right. Better clench up, Legolas.”

Clint turned and narrowed his eyes as Tony approached. “Oh, _fuck_ no,” he breathed out.

Tony’s hip seared and he was never more glad for the helmet. He must have flow the man up to the top of the building, but Tony barely recalled the action. He was too worried about the knowledge he now knew about the group of people around him -- this _team_ around him. All four of his soulmates stood there with a Norse God and all four of them hated him.

The decision to fly a nuke into an unknown portal had been the best decision. It should have gotten him away from living with what he knew. It should have gotten him some semblance of peace. It _should have killed him_.

Staring up at Steve and the Hulk, the battle won and everyone alive, Tony wished he had popped open his helmet while in the void to make sure he died.

It had to be better than this.

\-----

Somehow, they became a team. Tony brought them to the tower because he didn’t know what else to do. Thankfully Steve accepted the move this time, but Tony knew he wasn’t that happy about being in an “ugly building.” Desperate to find a way to prove that he could please them, he built an entire facility for the team complete with personalized training grounds and a large living room where the rest of the team could hang out.

Two months after moving into the new place, Natasha managed to drag him out of his lab and up for their team bonding nights. Week after week, Tony found himself on the couch next to one of the others. Natasha and Clint would drape themselves over his lap, while Thor’s arm curled around his shoulders. Bruce and Steve sat close but never touching.

Dinner became a thing between them, too. On Tony’s night to cook, Natasha or Bruce would meet him in the kitchen and help with whatever recipe Jarvis found. He stopped burning things after the second week, and by the fourth he was making the entire dinner without outside help. Natasha or Bruce would still show up, but they would sit at the attached island and sip tea while Tony puttered away.

Missions came more often the longer they stayed together. Wannabe terrorists and villains? Shut down before they even got started. Loki’s scepter? Found and returned to Asgard. Steve’s best friend came out of the darkness -- brainwashed by Hydra. More people were added to the team in the form of twins (Pietro and Wanda) as well as a paratrooper (Sam).

They weren’t his, but Tony didn’t dare treat them any differently. They each got a room, and several training areas were added to deal with Pietro’s superspeed and Wanda’s magic. Sam’s wings were stored in the flight room that Tony and Thor used already.

Throughout everything, Tony made sure they never knew. He made sure to never wear anything that could expose the darkened words across his skin. He insisted he hated his bare feet, so he wore socks everywhere to cover Natasha’s words. He got rid of any shirt that didn’t have sleeves long enough to cover Bruce’s words on his arm, and it also served to cover Steve’s words on his heart. Clint’s were always easy as long as his pants never slipped to reveal his hips.

He watched his team hover around each other. Tension grew between the original six -- Thor included when he was on planet -- and Tony knew that they would find their way without him. They didn’t want him, but it was obvious how much they wanted each other.

Sometimes Wanda looked at him, a frown on her face, but she said nothing. Tony appreciated that more than anything. Still, her pitying looks made him retreat to his lab more often than not.

He doubted they would notice.

\-----

The footsteps were too heavy to be anyone other than Thor. Tony didn’t look up from where he was rewiring Falcon’s wings, but he did put on a smile and greet the demi-god. When Thor didn’t say anything in return, Tony quickly finished and looked up to see a frown across the man’s face. The look was rare -- Thor usually couldn’t stop smiling around the team.

“What’s wrong? Is someone hurt?” he asked, pushing his chair back to stand. “Should I call Dr. Cho?”

“She is not necessary,” Thor said, voice soft. “However, we do believe someone is injured.”

“We?”

“The... ‘OG’ as you call us.” Thor stepped closer until he could rest his hand on Tony’s shoulder, his thumb brushing gently across his neck. “We worry for you.”

Tony held back the shiver that threatened to escape down his back. “There’s no reason for that,” he insisted. “I’m fine.”

“You hide from us.”

“I’m working...?”

Thor shifted his hand so he was cupping Tony’s cheek, tilting his head up. “Anthony, please.”

Tony closed his eyes as Thor pressed their foreheads together. The last thing he wanted was to be cornered by any of the team and questioned about what he was feeling. Mostly because he wasn’t sure he could deny loving every one of them. His _soulmates_. And even though he didn’t have Thor’s words on his skin, Tony felt _something_ tying him to the man.

He sucked in a breath as Thor’s free hand pushed his shirt up, but he didn’t try to stop him. Tony kept his eyes closed as Thor pulled back and tugged the shirt free. Gentle fingers ran over his words and Thor hummed to himself.

“They don’t hate you,” he said, voice still low and soft. “All they do now is worry, but they won’t hate you for what’s on your skin.”

Tony scowled, finally pulling back. He wrapped his arm around his torso, hiding his arm and heart. “You don’t know that,” he insisted. “You don’t--”

“Anthony, please. Trust me in this.”

“Do you even know what these are?” Tony demanded, finally opening his eyes to look at Thor. “Do you know what any of it means?”

Thor lowered his hands, Tony’s shirt still gripped in one of them. “I know what they are and what they mean. My people... We live too long to have them.”

“Then what would you know?”

“My dearest Anthony.” Thor stepped closer again, smiling gently. “Asir may not work as mortals do, but my feelings for you are no less than the others. I adore you, Tony Stark, and lack of words on your skin does not diminish nor change that.”

Tony had to close his eyes again. “Thor, don’t--”

“I have no reason to lie to you.” He held out a hand. “Come, let me show you the truth.”

Tony stared at the hand for a long time before he looked up into Thor’s eyes. What he saw there scared him, but there was only one thing to do. He took Thor’s hand.

\-----

Your soul words appear when you’re eighteen -- if you’re lucky enough to have them. Only half of the bonded are blessed (or cursed) to see the first words their soulmate will ever say to them. But, if the match is shown their spoken words and they recognize them, they are blessed with words as well. Matched pairs have their soulmate’s first words across their skin in the same place, forever reminding them of the day they met.

And in the Avengers facility, Tony Stark had four phrases across his skin. Circled around his ankle was Natasha’s, “I’m not here for you Stark.” In return, her ankle held, “It must be my birthday.” Paragraphed across his heart read, “Sorry, but I have to refuse.” Steve’s read, “Welcome to the year 2012.” Around his right arm like a brand, “Thanks, I guess?” Bruce had, “Finally, someone who speaks English.” Finally, down Tony’s hip was, “Oh, fuck no” while Clint obtained, “Right.” Thor had no words, no did he need any. Tony felt their connection with every touch. Every kiss.

Their words hurt some days. The casual phrases they each easily said caused guilt, but they worked through it. Because at the end of the day, they were a team. They were _more_ than a team.

They were family.

And this was one family Tony refused to lose now that he had them, initial rejections or not.


End file.
